Family Circus

No one can drive us crazy unless we give them the keys. - Doug Horton

Tuesday

NOT a Meme

I copied this from Ginger Bee, and I must say that this is not a Meme. The idea is not to list what you like or dislike, but what answer best describe you (optional: and why). You can see that I've opted to include why I chose each to describe me.

  • If you were a car what car would you be: Volvo Chrysler 300C with a Hemi (family car appearance with a powerful engine)
  • Book: Where the Sidewalk Ends by Shel Silverstein (entertaining and makes you think)
  • Movie: Ever After starring Drew Barrymore (beautiful, but she's no wilting flower!)
  • Weather: Sunny with a 30% chances of Thunderstorms (I'm happy, but there's always a chance I'll get ticked off)
  • Drink: Hot coffee - black (If you need to 'doctor' me to suit your taste, you don't love me)
  • Ice Cream Flavor: Blue Bunny Chocolate Bunny Tracks (you can see the chocolate pieces, but are surprised when you bite one, there's sweet caramel filling)
  • Song or Genre of Music: Gypsy Kings (adventurous beat in a language you may not understand)
  • Shoe: Red, High-heeled Boots ( noticeable, sexy, can be used as a weapon)
  • Website: My own blog!
  • Food: Meatballs and Gravy (Americans call it spaghetti sauce, but my grandma was Italian. It's a comfort food and an indulgence)

Please feel free to copy and spread this Not A Meme!

Monday

What are eyebrows for anyway?

As was routine after a good feeding with my newborn daughter, I put her on my shoulder and patted her on the back (read: whacked her repeatedly for several minutes) until she produced a resounding belch. Of course, DH and I cheered her accomplishment. A moment after that, it struck me as strange, so I asked my husband, "At what age do we stop congratulating her on expelling gas?"My fresh-out-of-college Prince Charming replied, "What do you mean?" Seven years later, we have three daughters that laugh hysterically before they announce : 'Excuse Me' for a burp, or 'Pardon Me' for gas. My seven year old feels it's her duty to comment on the odiferous qualities of each one. She was once heard to say to her five year old sister, "That was a good one! Do I still have eyebrows?!" Ahh. My girls are actually boys in floral prints. What's nice is that I can now use the statement I heard my mother say repeatedly when I was young:
My life may be many things, but never boring.

Sunday

Long ago, and far away...

If you want to see what I looked like as a nine year old, give this a click!

Saturday

It's SATURDAY

Read: I have all three girls at home with me today and DH works until 4PM. No reinforcements. Have I done this before? Sure, but today they had Cocoa Puffs for breakfast. Why doesn't the ad say, "Sugar-coated, sugar-fortified, chocolate-flavored balls of sugar!" My girls are already bouncing off the walls, and it's not even 7:30AM. Did I mention that it's raining? Since about 2AM. I woke up with the blurred vision that precedes a migraine. Oh boy. Please pray for me. And for my daughters. I've posted about Stinker's speech progress on my other blog.

***UPDATE*** The girls are working on 'projects' - lots of markers, glue, scissors are involved. Don't know exactly what each is creating, but they are happy and being quite pleasant. I look forward to seeing their handiwork later in the day. Stinker is snuggling with me quietly on the couch, between her routine inspections of her sisters' crafts. We have a movie to watch: 'Valiant'.

Friday

Men's Rejection

DH read the list of top rejection statements that women give to men asking for a date. Number One was: "It's my week to pick up donuts for my Singles with STDs meeting."

Thursday

Check it out!

I've posted today's Stinker story on the blog about my three daughters, called 'Hat Trick'.

Wednesday

My Temperment

You Have a Sanguine Temperament

You are an optimistic person who is easily content.
You enjoy casual, light tasks - never wanting to delve too deep into anything.
A bit fickle, it's easy for you to change plans or paths when presented with something better.

You enjoy all of the great things life has to offer - food, friends, and fun.
A great talker, you can keep the conversation going for hours.
You are optimistic and sure of your success. If you fail, you don't worry about it too much.

At your worst, you are vain. You are obsessed with your own attractiveness.
A horrible flirt, you tend to jump into love affairs and relationship drama easily.
You're very jealous - which just magnifies the craziness around you.
I am NOT jealous. Okay, I have a husband who goes out of his way to avoid making me jealous.

Tuesday

It's Official Now

My husband has offered to help me with daily chores in the past, but I've always laughed him off. I'm an admitted control freak. That's how I got into the situation our bedroom was in. I was once in the routine of doing two loads of laundry each day: one dark load, one white load. When taking care of a house and a family of five, that's what's necessary to stay ahead of the game. Throw in a migraine or two, and I can only keep up with the dishes. To say that I got behind in the laundry is an understatement. The laundry staged a revolt, looking to take over my bedroom. Actually, my DH had just run out of clean underwear. Let me put minds at ease. DH didn't a) wear a dirty pair, or b) go commando. He wore boxers instead of his usual briefs. I know that he was frustrated and very unhappy, but said nothing. I later thanked him, also telling my DH that he couldn't have made me feel any worse than I was already feeling. So, I found several pair of his briefs, washed/dried them and put them back in his drawer. When DH was kissing me goodbye yesterday, he asked me to get all the laundry washed and dried, piling the clean clothes on our bed if I chose to. He promised to help me put it all away when he got home from work. Whoa! My husband volunteered to help with LAUNDRY.

DH came home at 7PM, and I had done just as he had requested. There was still a load in the washer, one in the dryer, and one waiting to be washed. We tag-teamed folding/hanging up clothes and got all the ones lying on the bed put away. It was 10PM, and the bed was looking mighty inviting. I couldn't resist. I climbed in and don't remember anything after that! I awoke this morning prepared to finish up the laundry I had left to do, but found it already taken care of. On top of that, DH had cleaned the laundry room: top, front and sides of the washer and dryer, swept around the machines, organized my laundry supplies. I have loved my husband since long before we were married, especially today. DH really is my Prince Charming!

Monday

Thank you, AGAIN!

You have overwhelmed me. I just post about not having a best friend, but each person who responded to the last posts have shown amazing concern for me and my daughters. I am at a loss for words, and can only come up with 'Thank you.' I have created a new blog for posting funny pictures and stories about my rambunctious daughters: Halie, 'Princess', Catie, 'Sweet Pea', and Rosie, 'Stinker'. I won't be updating it as often as this one, but I'll post when I get something blogworthy!

Being Two Sucks, literally

Stinker is growing into a toddler, and still sucking those same two middle fingers. She is spending the time when she is not eating or otherwise using her hands her left hand is occupied by her mouth. She has recently discovered how to use this obsession to multi-task, as evidenced by the picture below:
She's been learning from her sisters, for sure. Say it with me: EEEW, YUCK!! I have never dealt with sucking fingers (or a thumb, for that matter), or ultimately breaking the habit. I do not want her to be embarassed as she grows into childhood. With all of my daughters, I tried pacifiers, just to get them off the boob for ten minutes or so. Never worked. I actually introduced Stinker to her fingers before we were even home from the hospital. She preferred those, since she never dropped them on the floor, left them in a restaraunt, or lost them under the sofa. Makes sense to me. I'm just curious if any other parents have advice on how to get her to stop, even if it is just to let her be a baby a little while longer. I cannot believe it either. I AM ASKING FOR ADVICE. I'm sure that Satan is shivering in his Uggs right now.

Sunday

Meme of Fours

I was tagged by Tee. Cheers to you, babe.

4 Jobs You Have Had in Your Life:

Assistant Mgr. Hallmark, Preschool Teacher, Security Guard, Licensed EMT. Now, I'm a cook, maid, chauffeur and concierge. All at the same time.

4 Movies You Would Watch Over and Over:
1. Princess Bride
2. The Matrix
3. The Sound of Music
4. Ever After

4 Places You Have Lived :
1. Oak Park, Illinois (birthplace)
2. Dallas, TX
3. San Angelo, TX
4. Big Spring, TX

4 TV Shows You Love to Watch :
1. LOST
2. Invasion
3. SG-1
4. Jack's Big Music Show (I love watching Stinker dance)


4 Places You Have Been on Vacation:

Las Vegas, Chicago, Orlando, Santa Fe, New Mexico.

4 Websites You Visit Daily :
Blogger, MSNBC, EBay, TBI Homepage. My story is there!

4 Favorite Foods:

Cheesecake, My grandma's Meatballs and Gravy,Greek Salad, Buffalo Wings .


4 Places You Would Rather Be Right Now:

1. In a nice hotel

2. with my DH

3. no kids

4. with a Do Not Disturb sign on the door.


4 People I Tag to Participate:

1. You in the back row. You never get picked do you?

2. You, biting your nails. Mmm-hmm.

3. You. What your name? Yeah, YOU!

4. I'd never leave you out! C'mon.

I love being tagged, but will not tag others by name. Just so you know that.

Saturday

Thank you!

So many wonderful words of encouragement and suggestions to get Sweet Pea moving. Please know that I did not tell the whole world, via the internet, to embarrass my daughter in the future. Trust me. I've got plenty of blackmail photos on hand for 10 years down the road. I love that other parents blog and read blogs as well, and will compare my daughters symptoms to their own children. Some of you have had this problem actually diagnosed, while the post has caused others to consider their own situation more closely. That was my intent.

Thursday

Sweet Pea's Pee-Pee Issues

I give Sweet Pea the credit for getting her almost four year old sister potty-trained about three years ago. Sweet Pea herself was almost two , and allowed me to turn it into a competition. When Sweet Pea woke up, my first goal was to get her on the toilet. She peed every time, and I went berserk with my obnoxious applauding and cheering. Princess would be in the doorway of the bathroom in short order, saying, "I can do that, too!" So Sweet Pea has been potty-trained for more than three years, and staying dry through the night for the same amount of time. Knowing that, you will understand the confusion that DH and I faced in the last months, when Sweet Pea began wetting the bed at night. First once, then once a week, which progressed to twice a week. We dutifully woke her up before we went to bed each night and put her on the toilet. Sweet Pea, in the same spirit, dutifully peed every time. The downward spiral continued, until she was wetting the bed each night, even after we had taken her on a 'midnight run' to the potty. DH and I decided that it was time to consult the pediatrician. We've been seeing this wonderful doctor since Sweet Pea was just a few weeks old.

Sweet Pea's appointment was on Monday afternoon. The doc asked me about her voiding habits and if they had changed. I answered the way any mom with three kids would: "I don't think so." His thought was she's not sitting on the toilet long enough. Sweet Pea is an active kid who would rather be out playing with her friends in the yard than sitting on the toilet. Hindsight's 20/20 right? I have been racking my brain for days, but I cannot think of a time that I've seen my daughter sit for more than one minute on the toilet. The doctor told me that if she's full of stool, it's pressing on her bladder. While she's able to compensate for that pressure during the day, she is more relaxed at night, and lets it go. He sent us to have Sweet Pea's bowels x-rayed. We were told that we'd have an answer in 24 hours. The was Monday at 2PM. Well, we learned today that the results of the x-ray weren't delivered to the pediatrician until 4:30PM on Wednesday. The head nurse, Mrs. McDonald (no kidding), called me this morning to tell me that the doctor was right. The x-rays show the truth: My five year old daughter is full of sh*t. My sweet baby is apparently quite backed up. Sweet Pea's going to need a bowel cleansing medication every day for a month or longer. And,what's more, I'll need to inspect every BM. Takes the redneck saying, "Ya'll come look at this before I flush it!" to another level!

Things to Accomplish Before 40:

1. Decide what I want to be when I grow up.
2. Start a new career.
3. Visit Ireland.
4. Get another tattoo.
5. Grow my hair out and leave it long, for once.

Compare this to my list of things I wanted to accomplish before 30:

1. Travel out of the country.

2. Get married.

3. Get my head shaved.

4. Jump out of a perfectly good airplane.

5. Drive a sports car.

Do any of you have a similar list?


Wednesday

Miraculous!

I do not have the words to express my gratitude to our Heavenly Father for protecting my family members involved in the one-car rollover accident on Monday morning. My brother-in-law, Justin, has the brief story and a gallery on his website. My sister, Kelly, has posted about this on her website as well. Please join me in thanking God for the miracle He performed!

This is so ME!

My mother reads Baby Blues in the paper each day, and when she sees one that seems to particularly refer to my everyday life with three small children, she cuts it out and makes sure that I hang it on my refrigerator. This was one that she told me of, but has not found its way to my house yet. If you have three (or more) children, this applies to you as well. Once Image comes up, click to enlarge so you might actually be able to read the captions.

Tuesday

Frightening!

Many of you know that I have finally come to a decision about what I'd like to be when I grow up. My classes at The Institute for Bodyworks Studies will begin in the Fall of 2006. I called the school and basically made a pest of myself to get all my questions (and DH's questions) answered. I am so very eager to get started that I paid for my textbook and picked it up last week. The $70 dollars will be deducted from my tuition this Fall. I called DH to let him know that I had picked it up, and he asked me to promise not to read it cover to cover that day. While I did scan the text, I managed to miss the graphic illustrations of human anatomy. I have always thought that the Anatomy portion of the schooling would be a 'refresher class' for me, after EMT school. No Sweat, right? Boy was I wrong! The textbook also came with a CD computer-software program. This is just a KNEE:

I had to learn bones and major blood vessels in my emergency medicine education. Now, I will be tested over bones, blood vessels, nerves, tendons, ligaments, and individual muscles! This level of knowledge frightens me. Deeply. At least I know what I'm up against.

Monday

Backyard Boy Scouts

DH, along with Princess and Sweet Pea, set up the tent in our backyard about 4PM on Saturday. When we ate dinner after five, the girls eagerly ate every morsel of dinner, knowing that if they made any objections, The Queen would pull the plug on the campout. Luckily for my daughters, I made macaroni and cheese, and only gave them a partial serving of Italian green beans. Not only did I not hear any complaining, I got rave reviews! "You could make this every night for dinner, Mommy!,"said Sweet Pea in her adorable, brown-nosing style. After tucking Stinker in bed at 7:30, I made a few snack bags with mini-marshmallows and mixed nuts for the campers to munch. DH led the way out to the tent. When all the beds were arranged and everyone settled, I went back into the house. My mind was suddenly flooded with memories of my own childhood camping rituals. One of them was cocoa before bedtime. I had no cocoa in the house! I walked back to the tent, explained my ritual of cocoa, and offered to go and pick some up from the nearest convenience store. I saw three heads nodding eagerly in the dim light put off by the lantern. I checked on Stinker, who was checking her eyelids for holes. I made a quick drive to 7-11 and saw that they had a special machine set up that dispenses Ghiradelli Hot Chocolate. I resisted the urge to put my open mouth under the spout I grabbed an insulated cup, filled it, paid for it, then dashed home to serve it to the girls and DH. All was right in their little rip-stop nylon world! I went back inside the house. I turned on the TV and watched what I wanted to watch, holding the remote in my own hand the entire time. Will wonders never cease?
I walked out to check on the girls once more about 10PM, and could only hear DH's soft snoring. Then I went back in and went to sleep. Stinker woke me up at 7AM. Record this for posterity: I got an entire night's sleep!
Astoundingly, all three slept out in the tent for the entire night. The girls came in just after 7AM, talking excitedly about the stories they had shared, and the shadow puppets each had created, and how they had enjoyed the hot cocoa treat. A short time later, DH comes dragging himself in. He was not so excited, looking rather tired, in fact. He headed straight to our bed and went right back to sleep. When he woke later, DH said he'd begun to rethink the purchase of a new mattress. Apparently after a night on the ground with two daughters attaching themselves to his armpits, our bed felt like clouds.
The tent stood in our backyard throughout the day Sunday, and continued to entertain Princess and Sweet Pea. I must say that I rarely have a day that my referee's striped jersey and steel whistle have a day to rest. Sunday was one of those days!

Sunday

What does your Blog say about you?

Erin's Blogging Type is Kind and Harmonious

You're an approachable blogger who tends to have many online friends.
People new to your blogging circle know they can count on you for support.
You tend to mediate fighting and drama. You set a cooperative tone.
You have a great eye for design - and your blog tends to be the best looking on the block!
Right on! Except for having the 'best looking blog on the block'. I'm still learning about blogging. Honestly, I'm still learning HTML! I'm curious to see if your blog reflects your personality!

Saturday

To Do List

When Princess brought home yet another stellar report card this week, DH thought it was time to celebrate. You may or may not know that my DH was, at one time, a young Bronze Palm Eagle Scout, and loves to camp out. I'm sure that he'll find the perfect spot to set up the tent, even if the backyard IS crowded by a massive wooden playground and a couple of 30 year old trees. DH spoke with Princess and Sweet Pea, and upon hearing their excitement, promised to retrieve our family-sized tent from the attic and set it up for the three of them on Saturday Night. At one point during the conversation, Princess said to her father, "Daddy, be sure to put that on your 'DO' list ." DH gave her a puzzled look. "What's a 'DO' list, Princess?" "You know, that list you make of things that you have to get done soon."

As it stands now, DH, Princess and Sweet Pea will be 'roughing it' in our backyard tonight. The Queen and Stinker will be snuggled and warm in our respective beds. I'll report on the events of the night later! Glad I have 9-1-1 on speed dial.

Find Out

I didn't think you could get more Irish than Erin Colleen, but apparently one can:
My Irish Name Is...

Eimear Duffy

I actually laughed at this one!

What do you call a cat who gets thrown in the dryer, never to be seen again?

Socks.

Friday

Oh Boy!

What do you get when you grill a Barbie doll?

A Barbieque.


From my first-grade daughter's lips to your, *ahem* eyes.

Thursday

He really IS my Prince Charming

DH normally watches Sweet Pea and Stinker while I take Princess to school. I'm gone 20 minutes tops, and when I arrive home DH can go back to bed or shower and get dressed for work, depending on what he's scheduled to work that day. I appreciate him for making this effort to ease the stress that comes with getting three wiggleworts ready before my 7:30AM departure time. Occasionally, I get all three girls dressed and take them with me anyway, just to let DH know that I take nothing he does for granted. Monday night, I saw on my husband's schedule that he had an early shift. I knew that he couldn't provide his normal babysitting service AND be ready for work in time. On Tuesday morning, I was up before my daughters and I was on top of my game. Every child was awake, cleaned, brushed and dressed before our departure time, and were enjoying a short *Noggin* show before we left for school. DH was showered, dressed and smiling when he walked out to the living room at 7:25AM. Both of us gaped at each other in amazement. We had BOTH risen early to take care of the needs of our spouse. You could have knocked me over with a feather! I have an appropriate nickname for him, I think.

Wednesday

Essential Appendages

I know that my mother had eyes in the back of her head. Since becoming a mother seven years ago, mine have developed quite nicely. My mother only had the two of us, my sister and I, so she only needed her two arms to handle us. I, on the other hand, had to push the limits and have three daughters.
I am thinking that a third arm should be included in the 'Motherhood Package' when you invest so much in 'purchasing' the third infant. When crossing the massive church parking lot (fellowshipchurch.com), Sweet Pea is relegated to keeping a tight hold on the hem of my shirt or the rear pocket of my jeans. I once said aloud during the journey, "Too bad I don't have three arms!" Sweet Pea replied with quite a snappy comeback, saying, "Yeah, Mommy, because it could grow out of your back and have a hand to spank you when you're wrong!" Oh boy. I think I beat myself up enough as it is.
My daughters are mimicking me when I see them use their teeth as a third hand. I use them to hold the napkins when I'm setting the table and to hold the new diaper as I'm removing the dirty diaper and doctoring Stinker's bottom. Teaching by example, I guess.
Any other moms have additions to the 'Motherhood Package'? Leave them in Comments and I'll post them!

Theresa said...
I wanted another SET of arms! And a built-in loudspeaker, and buttons I could push that would start instructional videos, or lectures, so I could just go about my business at the same time! :D
Jenn said...
How about an extra head so one of us can take a nap or eat a hot meal?
Zephra said...
All terribly wonderful ideas. I have always wanted some kind of telescoping switch so that I could spank the kids without getting up. And maybe a shock collar for the kids to wear that would go off whenever they argue with each other. Gosh, that makes me sound like I like to hurt my kids.

Tuesday

Fun and Easy Quiz

I copied this from Ben. Thank you, Silly Old Bear! This was spot on, with one exception. I don't have a best friend...*sniff*
How You Live Your Life

You have a good sense of self control and hate to show weakness.
You're laid back and chill, but sometimes you care too much about what others think.
You tend to have one best friend you hang with, as opposed to many aquaintences.
Some of your past dreams have disappointed you, but you don't let it get you down.

Monday

To All Those Who Were Concerned

This is day 5 of our Family Furby Fiesta, and there have been NO accidents or injuries related to the 'FURBEEEEEZ'. I have taken Buffi's words under advisement, since even as I type this, there is a green Furby with red eyes watching me from across the room. Makes me wonder when a Gremlin and a hamster had time to reproduce?

Sunday

The Meme Of Sevens Has Struck This Mom, Too!

Theresa tagged me (unofficially) you'll love her blog!

7 things I want to do before I die: See my daughters parent their own children. Travel the world. Get down to a 'healthy' weight. Put a plastic surgeon's children through college. Wear a bikini. Get Lasik. Win a Texas Hold'Em Tournament.

7 things I cannot do: Wear a bathing suit (it has a hole in the knee). Pretend to be anything but a redhead. See more than my alarm clock without my glasses on. Jog without getting both eyes blackened by 'the twins'. Change a flat tire, or my oil for that matter. Tolerate bigotry. Turn down a good glass of Pinot.

7 things that attract me to people: Intelligence. Rapier wit. A ready smile. Generous nature. Broad shoulders. Self-confidence. An obvious attraction to me.

7 things I would never say: That's a stupid idea. Don't worry, we've got the money. Not tonight honey (it's understood between me and DH, NEVER SAY NO). I spend too much time blogging. Since you're offering that highly-compensated position of power, here's the URL to my blog. I hate you. The 'N' word. I'm the whitest white girl I know, but it boils my blood.

7 books or series I love: Who's got time to watch TV with three circus monkeys in my care 24/7? Okay, okay! On my DVR right now: Firefly, Stargate SG-1, Monday Night Football (even though the Cowboys are out of the running), According to Jim, Lost, How I Met Your Mother, Invasion.

7 movies I can watch over and over again: Ever After. Princess Bride. Armageddon. First Knight. Fifth Element. Pulp Fiction. Matrix.

7 people I want to join in: You, you, you, and you, you behind the desk, you and you. Please make me proud!

Saturday

Five Weird Things

I was tagged by Tee on Friday. Thanks Tee. It makes me feel like I belong!

Five Weird Things About Me:

1. I wash my hair twice each time. The bottle does say, Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

2. I love being 'tagged', but do not 'tag' others. Go figure.

3. I love liver and onions - since I was little.

4. I only wash my face in the shower. Not enough, I know.

5. I will pick up most bugs bare-handed, but I scream when I see a cockroach.

Like I noted in #2, I will not tag others. If that makes you want to skip my blog next time, that's okay. I still love you.

Have a blessed day!

Friday

I often repeat myself

Yes, to my daughters, but also to upon encountering a stranger. I'm the kind of woman who never met a stranger. I find something in common with everyone, and can begin a conversation with someone I may never see again. In the course of conversation, I frequently say, "My daughters may not be redheaded on the outside, but they are redheads on the inside!" Princess recently went shopping with me, and during my conversation with a stranger in the store, she shouted, "YOU TELL THAT SAME CRAP TO EVERY PERSON YOU TALK TO!" I was silently wishing that the floor would open up and swallow me. I kept my wits about me, bent over, took Princess by the arm and said quietly through my teeth:" You have embarrassed me and the woman I am speaking with, and we both need an apology. NOW." Princess quickly apologized, and we got the heckoutofdodge. On the drive home, I told Princess that while she might hear things over and over again that I say, I'm confident when I use those sayings. I know that they make others laugh. I asked my seven year old ,"Haven't you told the same joke over and over just to hear your friends laugh?" When she nodded her head, I said, "Because you want people to like you, huh?" She said a barely audible, "Yes." So I didn't have to turn the situation around, and tell all the people that she meets, "She says that stuff to everyone she meets!" Enough said, I hope.

Thursday

I applaud the spirit of acceptance

I took the girls for a surprise dinner at BK last night, since DH wouldn't be home until after they were asleep. Okay. I'll tell the truth: I like to be the fun parent now and then. I've seen commercials about the new toys that BK is including in the kids' meals, and my daughters saw them as well. Over last weekend, I heard: FURBEEEEEZ! Mom! BK has 100 different Furby toys! Can we eat there soon? Puhleeze momma? Cue the pouty, puppy-dog eyes and the endearing quivering bottom lip, and they had me. I'm proud of myself though. I didn't take them right away. I made my daughters wait...until Wednesday. Come on! In a preschooler's perception it seems like a long week.

Luckily, when we arrived at BK, there was no one else eating. After Princess, Sweet Pea and Stinker ogled the display of possibilities for the toy in their meal, I approached the counter to place an order. I explained that I'd like for each of my daughters to have a different colored toy in their meal. The young woman looked puzzled. Halie was immediately at my side, and as she locked eyes with the young woman, my daughter decided that since her coloring was different that she must speak Spanish. Halie knows very few words in Spanish, not even one that she does not butcher. Halie decided that the girl behind the counter needed some instructions in Spanish, so my seven year old began rattling off our order in complete 'Spanish' gibberish. The cashier politely smiled and we exchanged glances. She leaned over to me and said, "I'm not Mexican. I'm from Nicaragua."
I replied in the same hushed tones, "She just likes to think that she knows a foreign language."
The cashier smiled, handed me our order, and we went into the playroom in the back of the restaurant. When we drove home later, pulled into the garage and began to pile out of the SUV. I heard Halie shouting, "Hola!" to our sweet neighbors next door. They are a couple in their 70s from Cambodia! I had to call DH and tell him about this. After hearing the events, my husband laughed and said, "Well, we live in Texas, she was just playing the percentages." I'm wishing that I had focused on Spanish classes rather than the 'French' I took for two years and have never needed again. Hindsight's always 20/20, isn't it?
BTW, the girls did get three different colored Furby toys, and they have not fought over them one time so far.

Wednesday

My Little Sister

Kelly became a mother on November 1, 2005, with the only male grandchild in my family. Are we going to spoil him? No. Unless you think buying him lots of 'boy stuff' counts as spoiling. I don't. There, I said it!
The day after Christmas, my sister and two friends teamed up to transform her hair into dreadlocks. In the same spirit of wishing that I had been as educated as my sister about childbirth before I had my first child, I am in envy of her dreads. Little did I know that Kelly and I were looking into dreadlocks at the same time. My DH put the kibosh on the very idea for me. Rats! DH knows that while I might not remarry if he should die young, I WILL HAVE DREADLOCKS.

Tuesday

They're like Raptors, testing the fences for weaknesses!

I must say that I am payin' for my raisin' with three daughters that mimic my own childhood attitudes. With my oldest two daughters, it's like having a front row seat to observe my mother's life circa 1980. Princess exhibits determination and passion with each 'discussion' that we have. (Don't know where she gets THAT.) Sweet Pea has labeled herself an 'Oscar-winning actor', spouting tears on cue. She's a generally well-behaved, dramatic five year old. I'm hoping that when Sweet Pea wins her first Oscar, she remembers to thank her parents.
DH and I have been trying a new approach to discipline, and Princess has snapped right into line (even on vacation!), while Sweet Pea has been pushing the limits. What about the baby? Stinker? No, I didn't forget to include her. Oh, but she's still a baby. She's just 2, no rules apply to her. Um, why are you looking at me like that? Yes, I know she'll grow up eventually. No, I'm not spoiling her. Well, you are entitled to your opinion. I've been calling her Stinker so much lately that Princess and Sweet Pea have started referring to her by that nickname as well. I've got to come up with something that suits her personality. How about 'Firecracker'?
Meanwhile, back on the Ranch: DH and I figure that between his Irish-Cherokee heritage, and my Irish-Italian heritage, our daughters got a double-dose of determination, temper, passion, plus enough freckles for every American to have a few sprinkled across their nose.

Speaking of dealing with your own children in moments of frustration, one mommy blogger friend of mine has asked for any advice you might have on dealing with a three year old. Please stop by and let her know that you've felt her frustration, and how it does pass with time.

Monday

Mom Wisdom

No matter how hard you hug your money, it never hugs back.

Sunday

Fashion Slams, Hollywood Style

HAPPY NEW YEAR! Unable to design a 2005 Review of my own, I've decided to comment on what I see as most distasteful. Fashion Slams. For example:

The MSN 2005 Year In Review, Best of Undressed

Okay, so I'm an 'outsider' who gets a thrill when a Hollywood, 'airbrushed' starlet gets a kick in her can. So I'm flawed...who's not? I get this one: Plastic, blonde, Barbie-doll-esque, Nicolette Sheridan. Desperate, yes. Housewife, uh-uh. Hollywood starlets pay big money to stylists to look their best on the red carpet. Then they are pressed by photographers, who will shout anything at them to catch a big-money full-face shot. I'd hate to be caught by the paparazzi taking out the garbage without a bra on. I wouldn't have to flail my arms at them to force them off my property. I could merely make a quick spin and level the photographers with my oversized, pendulous mammary pouches.




But, do not, I repeat, DO NOT pick on a redhead: Debra Messing: she had just given birth to a son, like 15 minutes before the picture was taken and had chosen flattering attire, considering her fresh post-baby tummy (I still proudly own a stale version after four pregnancies in five years).

Morons in Hollywood need a lesson in redheaded Irish-Italian women, huh? Wait. Are you lookin' at me? Do you wanna piece of me? Huh? That's what I thought. Debra Messing had a baby growing in that body just a few weeks earlier, and shortly after the birth was back to fighting form! As long as I'm working the alliteration, let me throw out another 'f' word to celebrity reporters...

CAST & CREW

Erin: 31, Emcee. Witty redhead, handy with a whip.

DH: 30, Strong Man. Comedian, defender of virtue.

Halie: 7, Chimpanzee. Pulls teeth, loves bananas.

Catie: 5, Leaping Lemur. Gentle and cuddly, loves grapes.

Rosie: 2, Cappuccin. Flings poo, loves carrots.

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